if you could only see the way

its a need to be harsh, bitter, and ugly.
you say youre down to earth, but no one who was truely the phrase would ever. you are so full of words and hot air that it astounds me. you frustrate me, you annoy me, you have me suffering inner battles for what i feel inside, and not in the way you would think. i want to hurt you, my words to be sharp and cut through your ego until there is nothing left.
still i hang onto your words and recite them over in my mind, dreading the day i may forget them and slip.
i long to speak to you, i struggle to be like you, my thoughts are rampant with ways to become like you.
i want to be you.
or very similar.
i want to be where you are.