feels like you are miles from here

for a moment there i was gone. i forgot. i was blinded. but the way things are came rushing back to me as fast as the wind that carries my heart to you. not a day goes by where i dont see your name in lights in my mind. there are so many things i wish i could hand you; i have no way to do such a thing.
i havent known you you're entire life, but i do know this: you were destined for big things. you were born into aspirations that requre greatness.
i cant put into words how i feel. i am so grateful for seconds of your time. i am inspired by the way you followed through on a dream. this isn't fantasy; this is reality. you are going places. you will make a way.

i cant write this poetically, because i cant keep my thoughts organized.
i am ridiciulously happy for you. sometimes it feels as if though i am so exuberant in falseness, but i am nothing of the sort. you mean a lot to me, and to see you getting so far, making so many dreams come true, it puts my heart in a smile. i cant do anything but. i am just so proud, so happy, so amazed, so...

i look at pictures of places you have been, will live, will experience, and i cant do anything but sigh with relief. you will thrive, you will grow, you will live so easily.

the english language is left incomplete; there aren't words that allow me to express exactly what is going through my mind.

tears rolling down my face are left unexplained by even my own mind. i cant comprehend anything right now, but all i know is im so ridiculously happy for you. a scene i was never a part of left me speechless and breathless, full of so much emotion, fueled by the most perfect song. i swear it was written for you. i swear it could have been.

i feel so childish, getting so worked up for something that really doesnt matter all that much. these words will go unanswered. will be laughed at. but i need to get this off my chest. at this moment; you mean more to me than any other living thing.

i feel so exposed, but i just dont really care. there are so many things i want to tell you that i cant, for fear of being scorned, for fear of things i cant explain. i am so broken, but so complete and whole. i am so lost, but lost with a sense of direction.

i want to experience so many things right now. i always get nostalgic for summer right around this time. i want an endless summer, i want a place you are well acquainted with. i am full of jealously and envy.