love conquers hate

we're all searching for something. for something that we can hold on to, to keep ourselves sane. to keep ourselves grounded. sometimes this one temporary thing that at the time seems permanent.. this one thing will work for awhile. we invest in it. we hold on to it and tell ourselves its okay. we will make it through. we will persevere. and then you fall. you hit rock bottom. or maybe you don't.. maybe you just realize that its a lie. all these things you've been telling yourself are simply little white lies to help you get through. so we realize that what we've known for so long, what we've put our trust, time and full-hearted belief in is false. it's nothing more than pretend. and if you are truly honest with yourself--if you sit down and are one hundred percent open--you will realize how unhappy you are. how all these things--a car, a job, clothes, food, dinners, tvs, stereos, ipods, computers--are nothing more than distractions to make us believe we are content. we are successful. we are happy. and these relationships--family and friends--are just shells of what they were and what they could be. that this so called potential we've lived up to (and don't we have the gadgets to prove it!) is nothing more than a starting point.

and that's where you can find hope. a starting point.

unless you are stagnant. and the support you thought you had really just criticizes you every step of the way. out of love, of course. but the plans you hold for your future are kept secret for fear of disapproval, of rejection. or worse, being scoffed at. because you know its easier going forward with plans that don't have any sort of criticism than to think you aren't supported.

deep down, we wish we had support. we wish we all could be happy. we wish our fears weren't legit.