teach us the way to overcome hate

i am a very spiteful person. very much so. i am also strong willed and sometimes too spirited for my own good.
in the past few days, i have had so much energy, i dont have a place to channel it towards. i invest it in tearing others down. maybe not physically, maybe not in words, but mentally. i have ripped those apart and exposed them for who they really are. instead of the results shocking me, they placated me. it wasnt them who i ripped at the seams, but myself.

for the first time i know this is now who i am.

i know what makes me tick. i know what makes me angry. i know what gets me going. i know what i hate, what i dont hate, what i want, what i expect. how to act, how to react. i know how to fall, how far is too far, and when to catch myself. i dont have enemies, i am my own worst enemy. i am at ease with myself. most aspects of myself. i can be beautiful. i can be ugly. i can be someone i wish i wasnt. but at the end of the day, i am who i am and i know this.

this is an accomplishment in itself.

i'm patting myself on my back.